Sticks, stones and words can break bones
Seeing as though my last blog post may have upset some "Boys" I have decided to share one of my worst break up experiences with you, my dear readers...
I must have been 18 years old and madly in love, or what I thought to be love, with Joe (not his real name). I wont discuss the relationship because the fact that it ended must tell you something, although we did have some really great times. I also won't discuss the entire details of the break up. (So what is she going to discuss!!!???).
I am going to discuss 12 WORDS that were in an email that Joe sent one month after the break up. Those 12 WORDS didnt just break the relationship, they broke me as well. Yes ladies and gentlemen, She can be broken.
For the next year of my life which also happened to be my first year in Varsity those words became my definition of me, they mocked me and stripped me of my confidence. They were the reflection I saw when I looked in the mirror and what I thought people saw when they looked at me.... (Ok so there was a tad bit of over dramatization over there...)
When I was planning this blog post I had decided to share these 12 WORDS because today they have lost their strength, I got over it, I redefined myself and fell in love with me all over again. But here is the thing- I can bring myself to type them, I cant. Does that mean that deep down in a very secret place, hidden from even my own self those 12 WORDS still bother me, today, 6 years later (do not calculate my age).
We met up, Joe and I three years after the break up and it was a pleasant meeting and it gave me the opportunity to explain to him that damage he had caused. He had to be told. Much to my surprise he apologized for his youthful folly. I forgave him, but apparently there is no co relation between forgiveness and forgetting. As humans we are constantly forgiving but do we ever forget??
I have only ever told three people exactly what he said . The third very recently, last week actually and we had a great laugh. Today those 12 WORDS reveal more about him and his shallow superficial nature than they do me and who I am.
I am sure you are wondering what he said. It looks like I am not going to reveal...its too dark...too sinister....too hurtful....if I wasn't so strong I would have committed suicide... I am being dramatic, over dramatic.
There is a plus side though, just after the terrible ordeal I desperately needed something to hold onto, and I found it, right behind me. Drum roll please... I fell in love with my derriere. Yes, my cute tush was my crutch. To this day you can not tell me that I do not have a cute derriere, I will not listen.
Word of advice, take it, it is not optional- Break off the relationship but do not break the person. Allow me to deal with the hurt of the relationship being over but do not burden me with harsh and hurtful words. Contrary to what we sang as children Sticks and Stones may break my bones but WORDS WILLnever ALWAYS HURT.
I must have been 18 years old and madly in love, or what I thought to be love, with Joe (not his real name). I wont discuss the relationship because the fact that it ended must tell you something, although we did have some really great times. I also won't discuss the entire details of the break up. (So what is she going to discuss!!!???).
I am going to discuss 12 WORDS that were in an email that Joe sent one month after the break up. Those 12 WORDS didnt just break the relationship, they broke me as well. Yes ladies and gentlemen, She can be broken.
For the next year of my life which also happened to be my first year in Varsity those words became my definition of me, they mocked me and stripped me of my confidence. They were the reflection I saw when I looked in the mirror and what I thought people saw when they looked at me.... (Ok so there was a tad bit of over dramatization over there...)
When I was planning this blog post I had decided to share these 12 WORDS because today they have lost their strength, I got over it, I redefined myself and fell in love with me all over again. But here is the thing- I can bring myself to type them, I cant. Does that mean that deep down in a very secret place, hidden from even my own self those 12 WORDS still bother me, today, 6 years later (do not calculate my age).
We met up, Joe and I three years after the break up and it was a pleasant meeting and it gave me the opportunity to explain to him that damage he had caused. He had to be told. Much to my surprise he apologized for his youthful folly. I forgave him, but apparently there is no co relation between forgiveness and forgetting. As humans we are constantly forgiving but do we ever forget??
I have only ever told three people exactly what he said . The third very recently, last week actually and we had a great laugh. Today those 12 WORDS reveal more about him and his shallow superficial nature than they do me and who I am.
I am sure you are wondering what he said. It looks like I am not going to reveal...its too dark...too sinister....too hurtful....if I wasn't so strong I would have committed suicide... I am being dramatic, over dramatic.
There is a plus side though, just after the terrible ordeal I desperately needed something to hold onto, and I found it, right behind me. Drum roll please... I fell in love with my derriere. Yes, my cute tush was my crutch. To this day you can not tell me that I do not have a cute derriere, I will not listen.
Word of advice, take it, it is not optional- Break off the relationship but do not break the person. Allow me to deal with the hurt of the relationship being over but do not burden me with harsh and hurtful words. Contrary to what we sang as children Sticks and Stones may break my bones but WORDS WILL
u make mi proud each and every dae dear!!!
ReplyDeletethank you thank you, you are far too kind :-)
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